Pretty.

I couldn't watch this and NOT share it with you all. It is absolutely amazing. Because, yes! Oh my goodness, yes! That word - pretty. That word and all its synonyms have haunted my life and my feelings about myself for as long as I can remember. It still lurks there despite all I've accomplished and all the things I am. And you know what? That's crap. We shouldn't be fixated on this word and we should't continue to raise generations of girls/women to let this loaded word have a hold on them. 

There are so many things I want to say about this but I think excessive nodding, shouting of the word YES, and fist pumping  most accurately sum up my feelings.Please watch and prepare to have your mind BLOWN.

You can learn a bit about Katie and hear some of her thoughts on the indoctrination of young girls in he first three minutes of this video. You can continue watching for another performance of "Pretty" and what I am pretty sure is someone's cellphone going off (for what feels like forever) a minute or so in to Katie's performance. If you have thoughts, want to vent with me, or just want to share your enthusiasm, you know where to find me.

First Editions Club

In April, Ann Patchett visited my local bookstore to promote her newest novel State of Wonder. During her visit, she answered a lot of questions about her bookstore Parnassus Books. In 2011, lamenting the decline of the independent bookstore - and the demise of pretty much every bookstore in Nashville, Tennessee -  Ms. Patchett opened Parnassus Books. Parnassus just celebrated its one year anniversary and is doing quite well. If you're interested in learning a bit more about the story behind the store the NY Times ran an article back in 2011 right before Parnassus was set to open. And for something straight from the horse's mouth - here's an article written by Ann Patchett herself for the December 2012 issue of The Atlantic.

One of the things that caught my attention during her visits was her mention of the Parnassus First Editions Club. First Editions Club combines the love of owning a physical book with the love of a good suggestion. It's basically the employee suggestion wall at your local bookstore straight to your house! Here's how it works - each month, for the cost of the book plus a small shipping fee, members receive a signed first edition recommended by the Parnassus staff. I've been a member since May and Parnassus has continuously chosen winners! I'm a few books behind in my First Editions Club reading but hope to catch up within the next month and a half. Here are the books I've received so far -

Parnassus First Editions Club

Jen Quintanilla's favorite books »

Just in case you're wondering - YES, I did in fact receive a signed first edition of JK Rowling's newest book. Here's my proof.

And yes, all I paid was shipping and the cost of the book. Did I hug the book when it arrived? Absolutely!

I've really enjoy being a member of the First Editions Club because, for the most part, these are books I wouldn't have necessarily picked up had they not arrived on my doorstep. I have yet to be disappointed. If you want to join you can do so here. Also, you have time to return the books once they arrive and you can put a hold on your membership at any time. For example, one of the selected books was one I'd won in a Penguin contest, so I asked to put my account on hold for one month. Parnassus skipped over the book I already owned and the following month the next pick arrived in my mail box. No hassle!

More importantly, if you join the Parnassus Books First Editions Club, you'll be supporting a great small business and helping (what I consider to be a national treasure) an independent bookstore which, at this point in the game, is basically the love child of a unicorn and the Little Engine that Could. So consider joining or at the very least watch out for the First Editions Club's newest picks and if one catches your eye place an order with Parnassus!  

2012: A (sort of) Recap

Hi Readers ... that is if there are any of you still out there.

I've been rather bad at maintaining this little corner of the internet. I can't tell you how many times I've started and deleted posts either getting bored, running out of steam, or assuming you'd all abandoned me and lost interest. Well, even if you have lost interest I've decided to try and come back for my own sake.

You see, 2012 was rather busy. Ok, 2012 was INCREDIBLY BUSY and 2013 is shaping up to be more of the same. I've decide that recommitting to maintaining my blog will be a nice break from the hustle and bustle of everyday life. So, let's give it another try, shall we?

2012. What can I say? There was a lot to be done and somehow I managed to pull it all off. Whether I was a nice person to be around or even tolerable through most of it is a question for those around me. At this point it all seems like a bit of a blur. However, I will admit that I've been patting myself on the back for making it through the year relatively unscathed. So what exactly made 2012 so busy?

Well, first I joined the Junior League. The actual joining part occurred in the fall of 2011 but the real work was done in 2012. There was a lot of fun but there was also a lot of work. I really tried my hardest to get involved in my community in 2012 and I think I made a good start. My involvement in the Junior League and some of my Pasadena excursions have really helped me settle in. In 2012, I finally reached a place where I was comfortable called Pasadena home. I now love it here so much, and feel so invested, that the though of moving somewhere else is actually really distressing. We'd always talked about Southern California being a temporary move but I really love Pasadena and leaving is, at the moment, unimaginable. Now all I need to do is won the lottery so we can buy a craftsman home. haha. JK ... but seriously... Mega Millions Gods, I'm talking to you.

Anyway, Junior League kept me busy. There as a lot to plan and a lot of donations to be solicited for our provisional member event. I had a lot going on but managed to volunteer at some really amazing places, meet a great group of women, and dedicated a lot of time to a really great non-profit. I learned a lot about myself in 2012 and managed to develop some skills I didn't even know I had. Thanks, Junior League!

The other big thing that went on in 2012 was wedding planning and then you know, the actual wedding part. Man, I traveled A LOT in 2012! Shuttling back and forth between NYC and LA to get the wedding planned and everything in place. I'd originally intended to be one of those people who documented wedding planning on my blog but when it came down to it I was usually way to exhausted or just didn't feel like thinking about certain things any longer than I had to.

Wedding planning definitely wasn't without its stress and sometimes a lot of the time it was really hard to keep the bigger picture in mind. You know, the "this is about getting married and not about whether the flowers are just right." Because, for all of you out there planning weddings or thinking about planning weddings, sometimes it really does just feel like you'll die if the flowers aren't right. Or, as an otherwise rational person, you will find it is quite easy to convince yourself your wedding will be awful and not worth remembering if your shoes are the wrong color or the cake design doesn't compliment the aesthetic. Oh and also - as a side note - that aesthetic will most likely come to you in the eleventh hour in what one can only assume is the divine - ist of divine intervention and you will then spend hours (HOURS) hot glue gunning ribbon to glass jars and little silver scoops to make a blue and pink candy buffet. Or maybe you're really awesome and you'll figure all this out before hand and it will all fall together and develop organically and stress free. That happens for some people, right?

I got a first hand lesson - as in, in your face, this is happening whether you like it or not, so hold on lest you be swept away in the maelstrom - in the one thing everyone tries to tell you the second you get engaged - weddings bring up crazy things and make otherwise rational people act insane. I'm fairly certain the last month or so before my wedding aged me ten years. I've got the budding gray hairs (seriously) to prove it.  But, I survived and actually the wedding turned out really well. It was smallish - probably a max of 90 guests - in the end. For the most part, despite the absence of a few people who we wished could make it but didn't, everyone we hoped would be able to attend did.  The wedding was a lot of fun and at brunch the next day, I heard a lot of really funny stories - including stories from basically all of my bridesmaids about how they took shots with my mom. Suffice it to say, everyone had a good time.

Mostly, I can't believe its been six months since the wedding. When I look back on some of the not so happy stuff that happened in the days leading up to the wedding I'm starting to feel less and less of the "I wish none of this had happened" emotions and more of the "I'm happy none of this happened at the wedding" emotions and some of the "such is life" emotions. Nothing is really ever perfect but I think the end result - the wedding - was as close as it could have been. What matters anyway is that after what felt like the longest engagement on the planet (obviously, not really) we got married. The day of went really smoothly and I'm happy the actual day of didn't stress me out. Although, that is because through most of it I kind of felt like I was in a haze and everyone sounded like the teacher from Charlie Brown.

Oh yea, and then I got a job. Two or three days before I left LA for the wedding, I got a call from the LA Superior Court for an interview. If I talk to you somewhat regularly, you'll remember that sometime in April (or maybe May), I was called in to produce a writing sample on the fly. I was given an assignment and told to do it, as phase 1 of my interview. Apparently what I wrote was acceptable and I was then asked to come back in for an in person interview. It went well but I thought I was for sure doomed when I started the interview with "BTW - I'm flying to NYC it three days and won't be back for a month. Sorry!" But apparently that was fine because before I felt for the wedding, I got a call telling me I'd got the job. yay! Except then when I got back I worked my ass off the months of July and had about 2 days off the entire month. Mostly, my life has been full of a lot of this...

While it definitely sucks at times, I'm thankful to have a job and let's be honest, to have the money. With two incomes we're flying through our debt which is really one of our biggest accomplishments this year. The start of 2013 is showing no chance that my job will slow down of be more manageable. Wish me luck...

Those are just the big three things from 2012. There were so many other exciting things this year that I wish I had shared with all of you - like Wine Riot, our Thanksgiving 5K, the fact that I joined a gym (and actually go - le gasp - when I can get out of work before 7pm), I read 41 books this year, I enjoyed some great live theater!! Scrolling through my pictures I am reminded of all the fun I had in the midst of the insanity that was 2012. I'm hoping 2013 is just as fun but a tad bit slower - for the sake of my sanity.

So with this (lengthy - sorry) post, I'm resolving to make 2013 a year where I update my blog at least one a week. I think I can do it! I can do it, right? Is it cheating if I write some posts in advance and have them auto publish on certain dates? I'll try not to do that but I have a few things I've been meaning to blog about so I might bang out some posts this weekend.

So ... here's to a wonderful 2013 full of lots of blogging and merriment, and (hopefully) less stress!

Wedding Cake for Breakfast

Continuing on my post wedding wind down, I've been slowly making my way through this book given to me by another lovely friend. My friends are the best!

Anyway, this week has been pretty awful (and the weekend is going to be awful too) and at 5:30 I pretty much gave up and decided to leave work. Yea, I know that sounds weird since most people are of the thought that "well, yes. It is 5:30 why wouldn't you be going home?!" Well, my job is a different story for a different time.

But back to my current story - I was in a bad place, left work, and hopped on the train. Finally starting to relax, I opened up my book to continue reading and read the following:

I took a deep breath. "I don't want you to marry that girl. I lied when I said I liked her." That was all I had planned to say, but my mouth kept talking. "In fact, you are not allowed to marry her. You are only allowed to marry me." 

He looked at me, calm and carefully, observing, the way he always was, and then he shrugged. "I've been waiting for you to say that for seven years."And that was it. We sat there, both of us scared and dumbfounded, but with the brightest kind of happiness building unstoppably up behind that. I said, "Well. We should kiss." 

So we did. It was a good kiss. A really good kiss. Maybe not worth seven years of waiting-and Lord knows it should have happened earlier-but it came pretty damn close. The air had that crisp apple edge it sometimes gets in mild, southern winters. To this day, when the seasons change and the air gets crisp, I find myself breathing deep, and that familiar bright happiness still rises in me. 

Then we separated and stared at each other, and that was far as it went. We were both in relationships, and we didn't want to start with each other wrong, by cheating other people. I told him to call me in three days. If he was free, I said. If he had meant it. I told him I was pretty much in love with him and would be single come tomorrow, regardless. 

Before we parted, I made it clear that I wasn't interested in "trying it out" and "seeing if this would work." I wouldn't risk losing his friendship for the sake of some dumb experiment. Either he was all in, total commitment, heading toward marriage with a bullet, or we would simply go home, give it a few days to settle, chalk it up to 4 a.m. lunacy after the emotional tumult of a wedding and a funeral. We could, I said, return to our friendship relatively unscathed. 

Three days later, the phone rang. He had picked to go all in.  

And then I proceeded to silently cry while riding the train from Los Angeles to Pasadena, protected by the shade of my large sunglasses. I cried. I was already emotional, I'd been on the verge of crying all day but these tears weren't frustrated -my job is killing me three weeks in, I want to curl up in a ball and disappear-tears. There were happy, sweet, this essay knows my life tears. Because you guys, this...there are no words.

A Practical Wedding

Things around here are just now starting to get back to normal now, three weeks after the wedding. I have so much to tell you guys but will save that for another post!

There is still a lot of wedding wrap up to be done - like writing thank you notes but slowly little things are happening that are truly making me feel free from the weight of planning a wedding. Like Thursday, the last of the five million checks I wrote in June to pay off balances for the wedding cleared. Financially, we are free of the wedding! Then while walking home from work on Friday, I saw a wedding party taking photos outside of the Walt Disney Concert Hall and openly giggled. My wedding was great but seriously, I am so glad it is over and in that moment I was so glad I was not in that wedding party!

In the post wedding wind down I am reading some wedding related books given to me by friends. First up is A Practical Wedding, given to me as a shower gift by a lovely friend. While this book is technically a wedding planning book, reading it has been a nice way to reflect on the process. Also, Meg's humor and writing style remind me of the friend who gave me this book.

This passage from the book's final chapter pretty much sums up how I am feeling post wedding:

But there is a parallel phenomenon that no one ever talks about: postwedding freedom. Shortly after our wedding we were browsing in a bookstore, and I stumbled upon a wedding magazine. I looked at it, and I had this dull feeling in the pit of my stomach. Then suddenly, I realized, "It's not my problem any more!" And I felt terribly free. Because the truth is, on a gut level, I was glad our wedding was over. It was an absurdly joyous day and an amazing party. But it was exactly the right length, and when it was over I dashed out the door, giddy with the knowledge of what we'd just done. I was thrilled that our wedding had been so happy, but I was equally delighted that I never had to plan it again and that I had the adventure of married life ahead of me.
When people say that your wedding is the happiest day of your life, they have it a little wrong. If all goes well, your wedding may be the happiest day of your life so far. But the wedding marks the beginning of married life; it is the announcement of the start of something great. 

Word.

Pioneer Woman

You guys, I met Ree Drummond. Yes, I met Pioneer Woman. It was exciting, fleeting, and I pretty much already forgot what I said to her.

LIES!

I actually said the following:

Me: Hi! It's so nice to meet you! Your recipes have allowed me to convince my family and friends that I can actually cook and bake!
Ree: but that means you can cook and bake!

Really, I'm just good at following directions.

I found out Ree was going to be in town because I stalk my local independent bookstore's website for author signing. Originally, Ree was going to speak and take some questions in the bookstore's small outdoor plaza but this week we've gotten a lot of rain so the bookstore scratched that and made the event a signing only. Good thing I obsessively check their website because last night while browsing (after coming home from another author signing) I found out the new signing only thing required you to get a ticket. So while running errands this morning I stopped by the bookstore and secured a ticket in group B. When I arrived at the bookstore at around 4:45 (event started at 6 and they told us to be in line by 5:15) there were hundreds of people in line waiting. I found my group and set in for what would be a two hour wait to get my time with Ree.

I eventually learned that there were about 350 people in line waiting to meet Ree! I also observed that A LOT of people (and by A LOT I mean MOST) has multiple books for her to sign. From both cookbooks, to Charlie the Ranch Dog, to Black Heels! Come on people! Seriously Ree does not want to sign your 57 books when she has 300 more people waiting.

Anyway...

While standing in line I started chatting with a pair of lovely elderly sisters named Margie and Barbara. They were incredibly sweet and very fun to talk to. As we approached the door, I realized my cell phone was dying and I'd left my camera at home meaning no photo with Ree for me. Then Margie offered to let me use her iPhone and email the photo afterward! I quickly wrote down my email address and went up to meet Ree! I love kind strangers!

Behold! Photographic evidence that I spent a brief 30 seconds (probably less) with Ree Drummond, The Pioneer Woman! Let's ignore the fact that the lighting or whatever was going on in the bookstore makes me look like I have a spot on my teeth or some general discoloration whereas Ree's look like she just got them whitened. However, let's revel in how thin my face looks here! Ok, I'll stop now.

Anyway, if you want to meet cool authors and hang out in an awesome independent bookstore with a kickass coffee shop, come visit me in Pasadena. You know you want to!

And the Winner Isn't...

Let me underscore the obvious here: Reading fiction is important. It is a vital means of imagining a life other than our own, which in turn makes us more empathetic beings. Following complex story lines stretches our brains beyond the 140 characters of sound-bite thinking, and staying within the world of a novel gives us the ability to be quiet and alone, two skills that are disappearing faster than the polar icecaps.

Ann Patchett, And the Winner Isn't ... (April 17, 2012, The New York Times)  

**

This year the Pulitzer panel chose not to hand out an award in fiction. I find this very interesting largely because, as Ann Patchett pointed out in her piece today in The New York Times, their deliberative process is a mystery to us all. Why didn't they choose a winner? Were the finalist all deemed good but not good enough? Were they deadlocked? I'm the most people Patchett refers to in her article - I assumed the panel just decided none of the finalists were good enough to be given the honor.

Every year I follow the big book awards to see who the finalists and ultimate winners are as a way of finding those books I've missed after religiously perusing The New York Times' Book Review and my local independent bookstore. Patchett's piece raises an interesting point that I'd never really thought of, despite my personal use of these awards as a way to choose what to read, the announcement of a winner for an award that gets as much attention as the Pulitzer is exciting and draws attention to that book and author. I'm assuming the Pulitzer has this effect more so than awards like the Orange Prize and Man Booker Prize. With the state of publishing as it is and all the warnings about how people don't read, I'm not sure how much the excitement and hullabaloo actually translates into sales and a boost for bookstores and publishing, but I think the industry could use whatever it can get.

Anyway, this article provides me with even more questions to ask Ann Patchett when I go to her book signing in a few weeks!